(week 157) 1 January 2015 12 Step Study Big Book workshop
Step 3 is all about being honest with yourself and how much you need the Higher Power/God.
Definition of God: there is a God and not only am I not it, but neither are other people.
On page 59: Half measures availed us nothing, We stood at the turning point.
We asked God’s protection and care with complete abandon.
You want an answer to all your problems? You don’t depend on people, on yourself but instead depend on God.
What do I do when I put up and shut up and try not to manipulate a situation?
I ask God to take the situation and I live in my own action plan. That’s what you do.
Very simple. This is a simple program.
The program is to stop trying to control and let God be God.
This is the how and the why of it.
(i.e. the answer): We had to quit playing God. It didn’t work.
Resentment against God/lack of trust in a Higher Power
Stephanie explains: When people have trouble with God it is all self-centeredness. They had expectations: i.e. resentments in the making. I never argue with anyone ever. The one thing you never argue about is God. I don’t know (for example why horrible things happened to someone) but I do know in my life nothing happens in God’s world by mistake. I may say I don’t have any answers for you but you can use Good Orderly Direction (GOD). Teach them about an action plan. God is in this action plan. Explain that if they want to get well this is a proven way to do so. You need to have a God of your understanding: Good Orderly Direction. Keep having Quiet Time and you will find a Higher Power.
If you stay in the negative your life will be negative.
Whereas an Action Plan helps you focus on the solution rather than the problem.
Recommend reading The Reflections book, As Bill Sees It, or The Big Book, Al-Anon book Day By Day, etc.
1. Ask God to come into it.
2. Read a paragraph.
3. Write what it means to you.
4. Reflect on what you have written.
Often people who are antagonistic won’t even try Quiet Time. So it is getting them over their resentment to stick with. If they are desperate enough they will do it and they will get a HP.
Half measures availed us nothing. Just going to AA meetings is a half measure. If someone does not like the word God can say Higher Power or Good Orderly Direction. That is a very non-threatening way to have Quiet Time. Give them an action plan and say its OK to have a resentment against God. Stephanie says she had one. It was my own selfishness and self-centeredness as I wanted God to do everything. I wanted this and that perfect e.g. perfect parents. It was not reality. Parents are really sick people. I was a sick parent and I had eight years of sobriety and six years of abstinence and Al-Anon when I became a parent. I was not a healthy parent at the time.
So its taking them through the reality that they cannot have life the way they want it. And accepting that and letting go. They may not have had a perfect childhood although once they get over their resentments they can have a darned good life now. Resentments are the greatest robbers of peace and serenity.
Next week bring at least one resentment written out with the cause and how it affects you so you can read it to the group and participate. [We may spend a couple of weeks, or whatever is needed, on this before moving onto the Turn Arounds].