Step 11 Nightly review
Page 86 Review of day. You can do this any time of the day. As long as you keep your finger on your pulse of day and while you walk through your day, you do the 10th step. Continue to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admit it. That’s the living in your day. The 11th is a time set aside where you review your day and you thank God for the good things and ask God to help you change the things that didn’t go well and accept the rest. Like the Serenity Prayer.
Last week we covered:
First thing we do we CONSTRUCTIVELY review our day which means we write all the positive things, a minimum of 3-5 things you did right. Ex: I weighted and measure my food, day. I connected with someone I hadn’t talked to for a while, I got to work on time, I had a really good conversation with husband, sponsor; was compassionate and loving with my child. Really ask God to talk with you about what I did right during the day. That’s what a recovered life is. You can see your life in a balanced manner. You didn’t do everything right but did you certainly didn’t do everything wrong either.
Were we resentful?
Were we selfish?
Were we dishonest?
Were we afraid?
Do we owe an apology?
Have we kept something to ourselves which should been discussed with another person at once?
Were we kind? (courteous, polite–You can be kind because you’re a people pleaser.)
and loving? (You can be kind and not loving)
What could we have done better to be more God honoring? (ex: I could have done better by asking God to change my heart about my boss. I could ask God to give my boss the things I want. Or, I could have been more patient with child, in traffic etc.) Remember we’re clean because of the grace of God. What are we giving back to God?
Were we thinking mostly of ourselves?
Or were we thinking of what we could do for others?
What we could pack into the stream of life? Did you do too much or did you rest on your laurels and not do enough? Did you contribute to the stream of life?
But we must be careful not to drift into worry, remorse or morbid refection? Do you tend to get into those?
Morbid reflection is doing this without God. “Oh I’m so terrible” Is a reverse form of pride. Selfishness and self-centeredness.
Worry is like sitting in a rocking chair expecting to go somewhere.
Remorse is wasting energy. If you have remorse, made an amends to God, the other person and to yourself. Then you can let go of all remorse. If you can’t do it to the other person, you do it with God, write a letter to the other person.
The disease wants you in morbid reflection, worry and remorse. So miserable that you’ll numb yourself with food, alcohol, drugs etc.
But that would diminish our usefulness to others. You’re in to self. “Naval gazing” — Oh I’m so terrible. It’s limiting God.
If you’re in morbid reflection, go to God, write about it, what you can do to make amends, write an action plan, share it. Sometimes we forget how big God is. Morbid reflection will steal your joy, peace and will probably bring you back to your addiction.
Your purpose in 12 step program to be useful to others. We don’t get sober to get a great job, man, look good etc. We get sober to lead other people to the path of hope that there is a way to recover. It will really show you what our purpose on earth is. It is to be useful to God, others and yourselves. It’s not to look at your own needs.
After doing the review, we ask for God’s forgiveness, if we need to, and inquire what corrective measures should be taken. Ex: amends